Friday, February 25, 2011


Anger is like a parasite. Here it is, eating away at you. Here you are trying to figure out why are never full or satisfied. It takes a look inside to finally figure out what is going on and get rd of it.

Anger is like cigarettes. When we use them frequently we always defend them (it relaxes me, etc). But them squares aint doin shit but killing us, as is anger.

Anger can, will, and is killing us. So in this way anger is like a deadly opponent. Kill or be killed.

And on that note:

Self- reflect. Heal thyself.

Behind (And in front, around) the Name...

"People are light and dark, good and bad, high and low."
-Sesali B.

I've been meaning to write this for a looong time. I've finally put pen to paper/words to screen to put it out here. Fairly soon after I started this blog I felt pressure to defend the title. I was getting positive feedback in the form of " I don't use the B- word but I love your blog" and "Your writing is good but I don't think the whole 'bad bitch' thing is gon stick". I want to take the time to finally explain how I came to this title "Bad Bitch Society" and why I personally identify with the term bad bitch.

It should be very obvious by now that this blog is about women. Furthermore, I like to think that this little piece of internet space is honest about women. Honest and open to the fact that women come from all different experiences and in all different forms, as is the nature of all beings.

We aint all regal and royal all the time. Shit, sometimes our lives create broken spirits, painful memories, defensive reactions, and jagged edges. I can personally attest to this. So if you flinch when you hear me say "bitch", I say good, because that means you FEEL me. We all just trying to complete our circles, some of us had to be bitches to get where we are, to live,to survive. Some of us had to stop being bitches to get it together. Either way, I personally like to be reminded that underneath all that dainty shit we (women) are forced to absorb and adhere to everyday there is still a human underneath, fucked up, but perfect as they are.

There was also another component to the title. I thought about all the queens I know that are more likely to hear themselves referred to as bitches as hoes than goddesses, beautiful, people; the ones that might need a reminder to celebrate themselves as they are. To me I felt like it was only right to give them a crown and use my language around this term to redefine it and as my girl would Jill would say, let them be elevated.

So yeah, that's what this blog, about women, is about. Redefining terms so even bitches get love. Ya'll have accepted the term as something negative. Reject (unlearn) and accept a new one.

For those of you who don't know, peep what I had in mind when I started.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

They tried to make me go to rehab. I said no, no, NO.

Amy Winehouse is my favorite artist. She is me, lyrically reflected.

Her content is loud, un "ladylike", imperfect, and brutally honest. It be like that sometime. I feel like the easiest way to draw the connection between she and I was to just share what I hear.

-I appreciate the earth. (Mr. Magic, Addicted)

-I have an irresistible attraction to the wrong men, too, Amy. (What It Is About Men, Just Friends, Tears Dry on Their On)

-Ah. The bittersweet taste of rejection. The badder you are the harder it is. But each time it gets easier to deal with (You Sent Me Flying).

-I love when women are honest about the pain/confusion/anger that from someone breaking your heart... And then proceed to tell them to take the shit they bought you and get the fuck out (Take the Box, Back to Black)

-This orgasm was about me, not about us. You weren't even there. It be like that Amy. (I Heard Love Is Blind)

-Yes I'm a woman and yes I like to fuck. Yes you broke my heart but. Yes I would like to continue this sexual relationship. No I'm not emotionally attached. Yes I'm sorry that you are.(my FAVORITE SONG, In My Bed)

-I know I seem fucked up but you don't know what I'm going through. "oooo I just need a friend... Its not just my pride. Its just til these tears have dried." (Rehab)

-I love Mr. Jones too Amy. (Me and Mr Jones)

-You're the reason I don't love these hoes. "Over futile odds and laughed at by the gods..." Man. I can't even go there right now. (Love Is a Losing Game, Wake Up Alone)

I could go on... The significance is that Amy represents the part of me that isn't all dope and enlightened and cool and smart. She represents the side of me that's insecure, broken, and irrational. But hey I never said I was perfect, who is? People are light and dark, good and bad, high and low. And if you ask me to go to rehab I'll tell you no... I just need a friend.

Quote of the Day

"Energy comes before form. Your energy creates your reality."

Master this. Complete your circle. Be WHOLE.

A Short Story of friends...

Once upon a time one bad bitch said to the other, on the topic of how they came to be best friends,
"I needed love, you loved. You needed understanding, I get it"
Love is the HIGHEST form of understanding. And so it all makes sense that these two bad bitches were actually the yin and the yang in one of its many different forms. Two in one, a complete circle.

The End (Beginning).

How I Listen to Music

Lame title I know, but don't worry this will be short. That Nicki Minaj post just made me wanna throw this out there.

I like rhythms and melodies. I love the way the sounds feel together. Every once in a while the lyrics to a song will speak directly to me. But in those cases its not even really about the music.

Recently I found myself getting caught up in liking/disliking music based on the artist. But I've sworn to let that go and get back to the music. Hence the reason I can still listen to certain Nicki Minaj joints, even though I think she, and most mainstream artists, are full of shit.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Quote of the Day

"I'm not a good American"
-Sesali B.

Seriously, I'm totally not down with all that white, patriarchal, Christian, capitalist shit.

Thoughts from an Ex- Nicki Minaj fan

If you've been following this blog since the beginning, you'll know that I used to be a huge Nicki Minaj fan. I love female rappers, she embraced the pleasurable aspect of sexuality, was openly bisexual (or so it seemed), she embraced her feminine side (beyond the realm of "pussy power"), and most importantly she seemed to speak directly to the girls in the hood. Lyrically, she was and still is THE SHIT. I appreciated Nicki Minaj. She even had big tits and a flat ass like me.

Oh how things change...

So why don't I indulge in Nicki Minaj's music these days? well for one, I don't like pop music. There are a couple of current Nicki Minaj joints I dig (Roman's Revenge, did it on em). But the teeny bob hip hop shit she's been doing as of late rarely hits any of my spots. Additionally, The chick can't sing! I have been known to indulge in some artists that can't sing (Rihanna and Ciara to name a couple), but at least they know how to make a hit I can move to! Nicki, as a non singer, blends right in with the rest of the artists that can't sing and that I don't listen to. So that's why I don't listen to much of her shit.

Why do I no longer consider myself a fan of her's? Well here it is, authenticity is very important to me. There is nothing authentic about Nicki Minaj. She got a fake ass, which is cool, but continues to tell us its real. She claimed to like women, then denied dating and sleeping with women, then claimed that we all misinterpreted what she said, all the while making suggestions about dating Cassie, another female non singer. And then, as with many other artists who became mainstream, she switched the style up on us with her gimic.

Everyone's, including Nicki's, defense of this is that by completely lacking authenticity she's "getting money". Well... white people enslaved Blacks in America to provide free labor in a multi billion dollar crop industry to "get money". Gang members shoot each other dead in the street over territory to "get money". The media objectifies black women so that companies and execs can "get money". None of this makes the shit ok.

But then again... this is America, so maybe it is ok. That'll be my shortened answer from now on. I'm not a Nicki Minaj fan because I'm not a good American...

This is the Nicki Minaj I liked.... (pic stolen from

I don't know who/what this is... (pic stolen from